While I was on my blog break, I got together with my friends Kate and Kendra to watch the season finale of The Bachelorette (Team Roberto all the way!). This show is so cheesy, but I love it. I posted on Facebook and Twitter that we were watching the show. Shortly after, I received an email from someone who was shocked that I speak out against pornography, yet I watch The Bachelorette. This emailer went on to tell me that The Bachelor and The Bachelorette are both porn.

My first thought was: If this is porn, it is THE WORST porn ever.

My second thought was that if The Bachelorette is classified as porn, then the mostly naked Dancing With the Stars is in MAJOR trouble.

How do you define pornography? Is it subjective?When do TV or movies cross the line for you?

While I was on my blog hiatus, there were several news stories that I was dying to blog about! Montana Fishburne and her sex tape topped the list. Oh, Montana. Really?

The famous, now infamous, daughter of actor Lawrence Fishburne shocked everyone (including her Oscar-nominated father) with news that she was releasing the first adult video in what she hoped would be a series with Vivid Entertainment. Why? She was impressed with the way Kim Kardashian’s sex tape (which was leaked without her knowledge) launched her career, and she hoped hers would follow suit.

Seriously, can the child of Lawrence Fishburne feel she needs Vivid to help launch her career? Isn’t her father connected enough?

In follow-up interviews, Montana reveals that she began having a passionate desire to become a porn star when she was 16 and that she made her first home movie at 18. And her Twitter feed has been hopping with tweets such as:

Aw this little 13 year old girl came up to me talking about I’m her favorite celebrity and she is going to make a sex-tape when she turns 18

And…

It’s too late fools. Me and @ihatekatstacks are the next generation’s ROLE MODELS. You had your chance and decided to go to college smh hoes

I think it’s really easy to dismiss her comment about being a role model as craziness (and who is this 13-year-old girl!? Where is her mother!?). But really I have to wonder if this is what we’re coming to. Do today’s young ladies really want to be Kim and Paris because of their sex tapes? Does reality TV really have to cover shows about Playmates, the messed up family on Pretty Wild, or toddler pageant queens (and yes, they do belong on this list IMO)? Does it really have to be this difficult to find a skirt that covers my 7-year-old’s entire backside?

Here’s what I know for sure… our young girls need frequent, candid conversations about sex with adult women they can trust. The “sex” and “porn” talk isn’t just for boys anymore.

Am I just getting old, or is this out of control? What responsibility do we have as a church to model appropriateness to our young girls?

I’m guest posting for my friend Jason Boyett.

Yay, me! Jason’s book, “Oh Me of Little Faith” is available and a must read. The book takes a refreshing, honest look at our doubts and our faith. Plus the cover art? Fantastic :)

Anyway, Jason asked me if I would mind sharing some of my thoughts on faith and doubt over at his place. Of course I’m honored. You can read my guest post, “The Worst Breakup Ever” on his blog today.

I’m Facilitating at Idea Camp//Sex in Las Vegas

Yay, me again! This isn’t actually new news but the Idea Camp//Sex website launched today so I feel like it’s officially official. I can’t wait for this conference. Not only will I get to speak about porn, there will be many others (all way cooler than me) there to discuss sex, sexuality, and the church. GOOD STUFF!

Head over to the new site and look around. The confirmed facilitator list is great. I would love if you could join us there!

And last but not least…

I have a weekend with zero scheduled plans.

Yay, me <underscore and highlight>!! With three kids this is a rare, noteworthy thing. I intend to either get a lot of writing or a lot of napping done. I haven’t quite decided yet.

What is number one thing you hope to accomplish this weekend?

I’m alektorophobic.

I am terrified of chickens. Seriously. It’s actually a phobia. I bet you didn’t know there was a super fancy doctor word for that, did ya?

Normal people fear things like heights, or dogs, or airplanes, or spiders, or dying. Not me… I’m special :)

Anyway, my fear really does fit the definition of a clinical phobia. It is the result of an early childhood “incident”; it’s totally irrational (I’ve actually rated which ones are the scariest — black and white speckled are the worst, in case you were wondering); when confronted with chickens or other live poultry (quit laughing at me!), I have a negative physiological response; and it impairs my social functioning.

The last part is what really bothers me. I live in suburban Detroit, so my chances of having an unplanned run-in with a chicken are slim at best. I won’t go to petting zoos with my kids, and there is one cider mill near my house that I’ve blacklisted, but other than that I’m doing pretty well. Except for one big thing…

I would love to go on a short term mission trip to a third world country or visit Vietnam (where I was born and adopted from). And the only thing that keeps me from going is my intense, ridiculous fear of chickens.

Lame but true.

What are you afraid of?

Is there anything that keeps you from doing something you really want to do?

This one looked like something I would find on JesusNeedsNewPR:

I would convert to

Pentecostal just so I

Could lay hands on you.

And this one reminded me of the Song of Solomon (if it had been written in Japanese):

You seem so sturdy;

your frame, fit to bear children

and work my farmlands.

A little bit of fun and a GIVEAWAY

If you’re creative enough to leave a funny haiku (pickup lines or other wise) in the comments I will be very happy. Here are some tips on how to write a haiku in case you need them. I will send the person whose haiku I think is the funniest this fun XXXChurch pocket book sized Gospel of John:

I’ll pick a winner on Tuesday!

I love that! So, let’s have it…

What decision will you make today that will make God smile?

I’ll go first… today I will get up early and walk rather than sleep in an extra half hour.

Your turn!

I went to a Catholic Mass today for the first time in years to see my uncle celebrate the 50th anniversary of his ordination. Fifty years. I am so proud.

While we were at Mass, I was reminded that there are aspects of it that I truly miss. Now before I get started, let me say that yes, there is a lot about Catholicism that I don’t miss or don’t agree with. That’s why I left the Catholic church over 15 years ago, so you can save the negative comments. But I think that Protestants tend to give the Catholic church a bad shake, so I thought I’d share three things about it that I miss:

Worshiping with my family.

My entire family was at Mass today. Brothers, parents, aunts, uncles, cousins. It was like that when I was a kid, and it brought back lots of good memories. Sometimes my parents (who are both Catholic and believers) come to church with us. I love when that happens. It’s like receiving a gift. I think I need to start going to Mass once and a while with them. I can give them that gift too.

Communion.

We don’t take communion enough. I thought that when I started attending Baptist church and it was taken once per month. The church I’m at now does it once per quarter. I miss taking it each week and appreciate the importance and priority that is placed on it.

Reverence.

This is the most important thing that I miss about going to Mass. There is a reverence that people observe when attending. There is no doubt that people are entering the sanctuary with honor and respect. I LOVE THAT. I often think that we approach Sunday service a bit more casually than I’d prefer. (Example: I would NEVER, ever walk into Mass carrying my Starbucks). While the fog machines, flashing lights, and rock band worship service is appealing to many, I have a hard time saying that it’s better or worse than a responsorial Psalm (except that Chris Tomlin may have written one and King David wrote the other… and some prefer Chris Tomlin).

All I know is that there are some Sunday mornings when I miss singing the Psalms, on my knees, in the quiet solititude of a sancturary that smells like candles and incense. And on those Sundays, the worship concert and programmed service seem like too much.

Am I the only one that misses bits of Catholicism?

For the non-ex-Catholics, am I the only one who sometimes feels worn out by the Sunday morning stage show?

In fact, over a week of overcast skies has really affected me. I’ve felt exhausted and a bit depressed. Saturday and Sunday the sun came out and I felt great. Monday it rained (again) and the blahs returned. Seasonal depression? Proably a little bit.

Since May is National Mental Health month (and because I could use to hear that I’m not alone) I thought I’d ask…

Do you ever struggle with Depression?

As a Christian do you have any strong feelings, for or against, taking medicine to improve mental health?

When I put it to a Twitter/Facebook vote, the pencil sketch (which I found here for free) won hands down. Plus, I liked what we could do with it on the side bar a lot. Don’t you think the orange gives it a nice punch?

I was very reluctant to use Standard Theme because I see it EVERYWHERE these days and was concerned that my blog would look like everyone else’s. I’m so glad I used it anyway. It was super easy to work with and customize. So if you’ve been on the fence like I was you may want to give it a try. You’ll love it too.

So, what do you think of the new look?