Churched The Review

At once poignant and hysterically funny, Matthew Paul Turner’s Churched chronicles his childhood in a strictly fundamentalist church — the kind of church where the pastor dictates from the pulpit what kind of haircut is appropriate. Whether it’s watching the Sunday School teacher set fire to Barbie to show the kids what Hell is like or throwing the horribly satanic Sound of Music soundtrack onto a bonfire, Turner manages to set down his experiences with the extreme fringe of legalism frankly, but without resorting to wholesale church-bashing. 

At a deeper level, Churched is about what it looks like when a group of sincere and well-meaning believers set themselves apart from the world rather than ministering to it. Turner’s childhood church is a world unto itself, with its own exclusive cultural (as opposed to Biblical) norms and plenty of judgment to go around for those who aren’t clued into those norms. The more ludicrous shennanigans that go on might draw a laugh, but when Turner contrasts them with brief glimpses of the love of Christ, such as his father’s warm conversation with a local barber who smokes (gasp) and cusses (double gasp), the whole situation is revealed as tragic. 

Since it’s narrated from the perspective of a child, Churched also raises some questions about how we raise our kids in the faith. Since kids tend to see the world through the lens of an old western — the kind where humanity is neatly divided into good guys and bad guys, each distinguishable by the color of their hats — they can take the slightest bit of legalism and run with it. By his own account, Turner ran with it right through high school, and Churched might make you rethink how you share with your kids who Jesus was and what he came to do. 

Keep reading to find out how you can win a copy of Churched.

Q&A with Matthew Paul Turner

What led to you feeling like now was the right time to write Churched?

To be honest, I really didn’t think about the timing of it all. A good story transcends time. It just so happens that many of the themes from 30 years ago, such as fear, trust, hope, and judgement, work today too. And when seen through the eyes up a child, those themes become even stronger.

The experiences you write about in Churched come primarily from your conservative fundamentalist background. How do you think the evangelical church today practices some of these legalistic or judgmental practices?

Well, when I was a kid it was far more visible. Today, it’s not as noticeable. It’s subtle, which can be more dangerous. It’s in our dealings with people on issues of sexuality, whether somebody votes the “Christian” way or believes in the “Christian” formula. I think it happens relationally, too. Pastors have become “stars” and “CEOs” rather than being shepherds and servants. They desire for the people in their churches to serve, but they aren’t “serving” themselves. We’re legalistic about spiritual topics like holiness, prayer, small groups, and when church leadership is “dealing” with somebody’s “sins.” It’s no wonder we look so foolish from the world’s perspective; it’s because many of us are foolish. Not everybody, now. But a portion of us are pretty sick looking.

As a mom I was very taken by your experiences as a small child being brought up in a fundamentalist church and the performance expectations associated with that. For you, as a new father, how (or will) these experiences have an impact on the way you raise your son in a church community?

Yes. Very much so. It’s something I think about every single day, and Elias is only a year old. I wonder what I will teach him to be true, what I will allow him to find out on his own, and what I will protect him from. My hope is that I will always tell him the story of God in a hopeful manner, but that I present it and live it in such a way that it’s not just a story we hear and memorize, but that it’s a story we go out and live. And I want him to know that no matter what happens in life, whether he turns out to be a normal, everyday American kid or he takes roads that lead him to one of the extremes — good or bad — that there’s always a place for him in the kingdom of God. Grace doesn’t simply advertise “no limits,” there are no limits to somebody engaging God’s story — black, white, gay, straight, American, international, etc., we were all made to be a part this story that God is writing. I hope I can at least be a “true” billboard in Elias’s life.

Despite the serious undertones, Churched is a hysterical read. So, I have to ask did you really compete in a soul winning contest for the coveted prize of a pack of Sea Monkeys? At the time, did you realize that Sea Monkeys were a crap prize?

I really wanted the Sea Monkeys. I didn’t know what they were, but they talked about them like they were really cool pets. And yes, I did compete in contests to win souls. On many occasions. In various ways. My church was all about numbers: souls, attendance, baptisms, etc.

Matthew Paul Turner [fun]Fact Sheet

If you could be on any TV game show which would it be?

I’d want to be on the one where the contestants scream, “No WHAMMIES! No WHAMMIES!” I loved the little Whammie Devil when I was kid. I was afraid of him. And the Newlywed Game was fun too.

What is the most overrated super power?

United States? That’s not what you meant, right? Captain America. What did he do? He did have a nice shield. But seriously, his costume was ugly.

What word or phrase do you most over use?

“That’s fun,” or “That might be fun,” or “That sounds fun.”

What do you consider the greatest modern invention?

The lowercase i. I mean, Apple has changed the way we do life. I so wish I could be called iMatthew. Wouldn’t that be hot?! So cool.

If you could change only one thing in the world what would it be?

I’d offer every person in the world the ability to love themselves.

What’s your life verse?

Right now it’s Psalm 23:4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. Because that’s what I’m learning — to not fear or to base life on fear. I’ve spent far too much time being afraid.

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Purchase Churched and check out Turner’s other books (I highly recommend Relearning Jesus).

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