Let me start by saying that using this image made me really, really uncomfortable. I HATE that word and it upsets me when people use it. Hopefully it makes you uncomfortable too.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.

We all know that saying. I would argue that most reasonable people would agree that words really can hurt you. I’ve been hurt by other people’s words. Some of those hurtful words were intended to be hurtful, others weren’t. And often times the unintentional ones hurt most.

Just as frightening as our words physically hurting, words have the power to attract and they have the power to repel. The bible has a lot to say about watching what words we use. I love this passage in James:

With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be. – James 3:9,10

This passage has a lot to do with obvious things like gossip, slander, angry words, and cursing. It has to do with using hateful words like “faggot” and words that attack a person’s race or culture. As Christians, we all know that, right? Right. I also think this passage has to do with more subtle things. Things that slip into popular culture and roll off our tongue.

Monday night I was watching the Grammy Awards (don’t ask why). After the Elton John/Lady Gaga performance I read several tongue-in-cheek, double entendre-type comments on Twitter – from Christians that I actually respect – about the performance being gay or Elton John and Lady Gaga (whose costumes were covered in dirt and soot) being “dirty queens.” Nothing intended to be mean… I don’t think… just sort of haha. I know these same people would NEVER use the word n—–, or any other racially insensitive term. In fact, I’m almost positive they would never say the word “faggot.” But for some reason, “dirty queen” was ok. Out loud. In public.

It reminded me of when people say things like “that’s so gay.” You know, when you’re not intending to show prejudice, you just don’t like something. Well, I hate that phrase, and I was disappointed to see these comments from other Christians. I believe it’s hurtful. And I know that these kinds of comments don’t attract others to us; they divide and repel. I think that James was talking about these kinds of words too.

So, here’s my bottom line: I’ve been very critical in the past (and will continue to be critical) of many mainstream evangelicals’ almost combative relationship with the gay community. Personally, it offends me. Greatly. And I wonder whether the church’s disapproval of the homosexual lifestyle gives some people the illusion that referring to things as “gay” is acceptable?

Do a person’s religious or political beliefs about sexual orientation influence his or her use of words? Should they?

P.S. A friend, @SaintMateo, tipped me off to an organization called Think Before You Speak. It was created to bring awareness to the harmful use of phrases like “that’s so gay.” Brilliant. Thanks, Mat.

In June of 1963, two months before Dr. King led the March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom, he took part in a smaller yet equally important event in my home town, Detroit. Dr. King leading the Freedom March down Woodward Avenue and delivering his “Speech at the Great March of Detroit” -which incidently previewed what would later become his most famous words “I have a Dream”, is an important part of our city’s history and one of our proudest moments. In his address he asked this of the city of Detroit:

You’re asking, I’m sure, “What can we do here in Detroit to help in the struggle in the South?”…One of them one thing that you can do to help us down in Alabama and Mississippi and all over the South is to work with determination to get rid of any segregation and discrimination in Detroit, realizing that injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere. And we’ve got to come to see that the problem of racial injustice is a national problem. No community in this country can boast of clean hands in the area of brotherhood. Now in the North it’s different in that it doesn’t have the legal sanction that it has in the South. But it has its subtle and hidden forms and it exists in three areas: in the area of employment discrimination, in the area of housing discrimination, and in the area of de facto segregation in the public schools. And we must come to see that de facto segregation in the North is just as injurious as the actual segregation in the South. And so if you want to help us in Alabama and Mississippi and over the South, do all that you can to get rid of the problem here.

The challenge in this speech is to end de facto segregation and discrimination in Detroit (and across the North) specifically in three areas: employment, housing, and education. As we reflect on Dr. King’s life and legacy today I’m asking you to reconsider his challenge.

Have we, in America and especially in Detroit, achieved the dream? Perhaps we could say that we have in part however, I would argue that we have a long way to go.

For those of us in Detroit, we need to acknowledge that the Great March on Detroit could just as easily be happening today. Forty-seven years have passed since freedom riders packed the seats of Cobo Hall and yet the idea of a desegregated Detroit is still a dream.

Detroit’s current unemployment rate hovers near 50% according to the Detroit News.

Desegregation in employment is still a dream.

Detroit has never rebounded from the White Flight with an 81% African American population in the city. The great 8 Mile Road divide continues to separate the urban from the suburban most notably with neighboring, affluent Grosse Point, whose African American population is less than 1%, literally across the street from the city.

Desegragation in housing is still a dream.

And this was written by Steven Gray today on Time Magazine’s Detroit blog:

In the past decade, the number of Detroit public-school students has plummeted from more than 167,000 to 84,600, mainly because of the emergence of charter schools and the middle class’s exodus to the suburbs. It could fall further, to 65,000 in the next four years. Those trends, if they persist, will further erode revenues of a school system saddled with a $219 million budget deficit.

Desegregation in education is still a dream.

So here is my question for the City of Champions: When are we going to wake from dreaming? When are we going to make the decision to not settle for allowing an electrifying speech in a crowded convention center be our proudest moment? When are we going to wake up and decide to make action – radical transformation – the pride of Detroit? When is this city (leaders, residents, and suburban neighbors) going to realize the dream? Forty-seven years has been far to long.

Typically this blog addresses issues of concern for the Christian, evangelical church and my personal faith journey. If you’re reading today and wondering how this post relates to what I usually write about I have two answers. First, I wanted to honor Dr. King on this important day. Second, and more importantly, this is our concern if we are indeed the church. And I believe it’s safe to say that most churches, both urban and suburban, have not eliminated de facto segregation in the church.

Desegregation in the church is still a dream.

What are you or your church doing to make it a reality?

Side Note: My friend Matthew continues to write during his travels with World Vision in Uganda. He posted a very moving tribute to Dr. King and his thoughts on “The Dream” and the Ugandan people today on his blog. Please take the time to read it HERE.

If you wrote a blog post today in honor of Dr. King would you please leave a link in the comments. I would love to read them later. Thanks!